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 Toti's Note Book

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Toti

Toti


Posts : 29
Join date : 2009-04-12
Age : 34

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PostSubject: Toti's Note Book   Toti's Note Book Icon_minitimeMon Apr 13, 2009 12:16 pm

Brothers In Arms
Spoiler is the story.
Spoiler:


Last edited by Toti on Mon Apr 13, 2009 3:48 pm; edited 1 time in total
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Toti

Toti


Posts : 29
Join date : 2009-04-12
Age : 34

Toti's Note Book Empty
PostSubject: Re: Toti's Note Book   Toti's Note Book Icon_minitimeMon Apr 13, 2009 1:58 pm

Dance In Crimson
Spoiler:
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Toti

Toti


Posts : 29
Join date : 2009-04-12
Age : 34

Toti's Note Book Empty
PostSubject: Re: Toti's Note Book   Toti's Note Book Icon_minitimeMon Apr 13, 2009 1:59 pm

Dance In Crimson Part 2
Spoiler:
((Both of these stories are a work in progress, feel free to make comments and add criticize))
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PostSubject: Re: Toti's Note Book   Toti's Note Book Icon_minitimeMon Apr 13, 2009 3:37 pm

Toti wrote:

He stroked his cool hand delicately across my face in a caring gesture, trying to make since of my odd mood. It was early this morning when I had received the call about my father’s death, he passed over night after the stress of the medicines for his blood pressure and all the other things wrong with him, forced his liver to fail. I leaned against him nuzzling my face into his shoulder has he embraced me and began to cry. I didn’t really know my father very well, but to now be a bastard (?) , fatherless, was painful. He whipped (wiped?) away my tears with the corner of the sleeve to his brown American Eagle hoody.

“I’m sorry,” he whispered in my ear his voice soft and gentle. The tears came faster now, as I hic-upped softly into his shoulder. Kell was my best friend; he had been for so long it that it was hard for me not to cry in front of him. It made me feel weak, vulnerable, - helpless. His pale gentle hand rubbed my back as he whispered in my ear, “It's okay Leo, you are going to be okay. You can cry with me, let it out.” I slumped to my knees in the middle of the hallway of our dorm room, his body embracing me, warm and comforting as it followed mine. We stayed like that for a good twenty minutes, or at least it felt that long, it could have been longer. Kell always made me lose track of time when I was with him.

When I finally stopped crying he kissed my cheek, his lips warm to my cold salty (Gives an odd feeling the the description) tear drenched skin. “I barely knew him.” I managed to choke out, the knots that were (had?) formed in my throat finally untying themselves. I felt more tears start to bead up in the corner of my eyes again, and instinctively I turned my head not wanting him to see me cry more. “I don’t even know why I’m crying over that bastard, he left mom so long ago. I was only four years old.”
His hand came across my face with such force that I was stunned, the sound of the smack echoing though the quiet dorm, like an explosion in a quarry. It caught me off balance and I fell to the hard wood floor. “Your father had a very good reason for leaving and you know it!” He was yelling know, “If he had had a choice you know he would have changed his decision in an instant. He did what he did to protect you and your mother, don’t ever let me see you or hear you disgrace your father’s name.”

In truth he was right, my father was a scientist for the government, he helped develop the government super code and also their computer based security system. “I’m on top of the mafia’s hit list!” he would joke when he came back last year. He had been out of my life for twelve years, I didn’t need him; I didn’t want him back. Mom and I were doing just fine on our own.

I finished recalling the memory as Kell picked me up. He was strong, stronger than he looked. He pulled me off the ground like I was a feather, lifting me to my feet, he hugged me apologetically. “I’m sorry,” he mused.


Thats as far as I got. Good Story!
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PostSubject: Re: Toti's Note Book   Toti's Note Book Icon_minitimeMon Apr 13, 2009 3:47 pm

wow, that really really good, i can bearly spell in english, jk, but i nearly flunck it :S

amerecan eagle, ewwwww not my thing jocolor


Last edited by inilix on Mon Apr 13, 2009 3:48 pm; edited 1 time in total (Reason for editing : p.s)
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Toti

Toti


Posts : 29
Join date : 2009-04-12
Age : 34

Toti's Note Book Empty
PostSubject: Re: Toti's Note Book   Toti's Note Book Icon_minitimeMon Apr 13, 2009 3:49 pm

Lol Thanks guys, Erm I fixed those edits Shadow, they are much appreciated ^^
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PostSubject: Re: Toti's Note Book   Toti's Note Book Icon_minitime

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